First dA entry...only cause I'm feeling so freaking shit and I need something to do before I chuck something =.=".
Sigh sigh ... I was just thinking... usually I would say I can't handle another day, but I could have to handle another few years haha...I didn't realise I didn't have a choice =.="
Scattered thoughts...
Mann it only takes one little thing to start of a whole new tirade of hurt inside - this time it was seeing them on MSN. Seems like nothing... but knowing the fact that I can't even speak to them kills. Bah Bah.
I still force myself to look at the blog though, but I know it will pain me to do so. I just want - no wait, need - to make sure everythings okay with them. And also, I admit , the selfish, foolish, desperate, etc. hope that they might miss me even a little.
Gosh, gosh, the hols made me feel empty and numb, and I really longed to see the someone again - but now that I saw them at school (where I was conveniently ignored) the emotion seems umbearable.
Yeah, I'm feeling quite bitter/jealous/angry/hurt, but hopefully I'll rejoin with Sadness, my new best friend, where I can wallow in memories when I took their care and comfort for granted. Hopefully, Sadness will take me by the hand and tell me, quite reasonably, that I have no-one to blame but myself. And lastly, hopefully, Sadness will spark some divine intervention, and I can have my friend back, and I won't have such icy splinters in my heart.
Maybe these icy splinters could be soothed away, by a warm voice, or maybe hugged away, by a fuzzy embrace. And maybe that day will never come, and right now, that's exactly what's on my mind.
Well fuck this, I think I've rambled too much. I guess writing helped a little - well staved off the hurt for about 15 mins =.=", still better than nothing.
Bleh...need some freaking pills to help me get to sleep whenever I want...
Maybe I should smash my k/b daalglaghaguagagKLJSDG <---- that's my deviation for today = P



--
"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt" William Shakespeare
and hii irene
--
These Hands never let go
The bible tells me so
They didn't flinch when the nails went in
They didn't hesitate to cleanse me of my sin
and np, you deserved it ^^v
--
Here take this knife.
Cut out your heart.
Now place your heart into my hand.
*Stabs the heart a million times*
There now. Better?
I love your writing
--
Here take this knife.
Cut out your heart.
Now place your heart into my hand.
*Stabs the heart a million times*
There now. Better?
--
Simba...
No, I'm Jesus, LOL
--
If you like a piece by an artist, whether poetry, art, photography or so forth, chances are you'll like their other pieces.
One of the qualities that I have is that I think, its not necessarily the best quality, but nevertheless a quality
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